It wasn’t yet 9 PM when the penises started flying.
After paying the limo driver, the 33 women in Lindsay Alice’s bachelorette party stumbled drunkenly back to the Airbnb and the waiting bags of goodies.
Amanda, Lindsay’s maid of honor, had opted to give the limo driver a little extra tip by pulling down her top and flashing him as she handed him her number along with the money.
On the outside, Lindsay was all smiles. Inside, she was a little more confused. While the proposal at a Giants game wasn’t her idea of romantic, the fact that Kevin had finally given into being married was the best she could hope for.
Things were okay now. Work. Sleep. The occasional fuck when they weren’t too tired. While Kevin said the right things and did most of the right things, Lindsay couldn’t help but feel that something was missing.
Back at the Airbnb the women made appreciative noises as they ripped open the goody bags. Each bag contained wet wipes, water bottles, and commemorative bracelets (Lindsay’s idea). But there were also condoms, thongs, dick-shaped gummies, and 3 penis-shaped cake pops, complete with a line of white frosting leaking from the tip (Amanda’s idea, despite Lindsay’s protests).
Amanda tapped a glass and the girls directed their attention to the front of the room.
“Ladies,” said Lindsay, “I just wanted to thank you all for coming. From wine garden to the spa, you guys have seriously made this the bachelorette party ever.”
“To Lindsay!” one of the girls shouted as the group cheered.
“To Kevin and his 4-inch penis!” Amanda chimed in. The group cheered louder.
In the back, Gina attempted to fling a gummy-shaped penis at Vivian, but managed to hit Brenda instead.
“Oops. Sorry Brenda,” Gina said. Brenda responded by flinging her cake pop back at Gina.
Soon, penises were flying everywhere.
In a car nearby, four men wearing police officer uniforms conferred.